Wedgie Patrol!

This sign made me laugh because it made me picture a bar full of drunk people
constantly yelling,
"Wedgie Patrol!" at one another and giving each other wedgies,
then exchanging high fives.

The first time I ever made a prank phone call was at a friend's birthday party in elementary school.
We were playing the game,"Girltalk":

I got a dare to call someone and say,
"I want to order a pizza", then hang up the phone.

I haven't stopped laughing since!
(Don't worry I'm joking about the "I haven't stopped laughing since" part).

I have caught a bit of the US Open(the tennis tournament) on tv
and
have been loving it.
It makes me wish I was in NY right now so I could be there checking out some matches in person.
It makes me want to go out and play tennis too.

I love when tennis players get fierce when they play
and
slam their racket down if they get pissed about something.

I wonder if tennis players are taught faces to make at their opponents to inimidate them.
If so I would love to have a part time job as
An intimidating -face-making-trainer- to the tennis pros.

PS. I think a majority of my blog is VERY grammatically incorrect.
Don't judge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I guess when you meet people(especially in a job interview type setting),
it's always suggested that you smile a give a firm hand shake.
It's supposed to send a message that you're an optimistic soul
and
believe yourself.
I hate when people take it too far though and practically crush your hand in a hand shake
and
make it feel like if you don't escape their clutches NOW they may very well rip your arm off.
There's no need for that.
Calm the f@#$! down.
Really.
Because when you shake someone's hand like that you're basically saying,
"Hi I'm no stranger to cocaine
and
I also wake up at 4am and make it a point to strengthen my kung fu grip by doing exercises with these things:

The Secret Sauce
I was walking to my car pretty late the other night
and
it was really quiet in the neighborhood because all of the bars and restaurants had closed.
I walked by one restaurant that was closed but you could tell that people were still inside cleaning up and stuff.
The back door of the restaurant quickly opened to reveal a guy holding a large plastic bucket from which he poured a mysterious liquid out of.
It was probably just grease from the fryer or something
but
because it was done so secretly, so late, and from the back door it looked like a bizarre cover-up
and
like maybe he was dumping a toxic liquid.
It made me feel like I should take out my camera and take a picture of him dumping the "seceret sauce"
and
yell something like,
"I'm telling the papers!!!"
Then run to my car and speed off so the wheels of the car make a screeching noise.
I decided to just be normal and not do that though.

Have a great Labor Day Weekend everybody!
and
Thanks for reading this!