Straight to DVD Nightmares

The other night I had an anxiety dream that wasn't worth the anxiety.

I dreamt that someone called me and asked me if I wanted to audition for a stand-up related thing that I had no interest in auditioning for but for some reason I told them I wanted to audition for it anyway.
I tried to call them back to tell them that I didn't really want to audition but the call immediately went to a phone company who asked me if I wanted a new cell phone plan that I wasn't interested in having.
I told them yes too even though I didn't want the plan.
The next thing I knew I was walking to the audition I didn't even want to audition for and I realized I was running late and I should have driven instead of walk. I stopped walking and held my thumb up like a hitch-hiker to cars driving by.
One car pulled over and rolled down their window. It was a woman. She seemed pissed off. She started yelling at me:
I watched a clip of your stand-up on myspace about how you saw a hitchhiker. I was the hitchhiker you were talking about. You should have given me a ride!
She then gave me the finger and sped off without giving me ride.

The next thing I knew I was at the audition I didn't want to audiiton for and some guy walked toward me and said
Hi we decided to not have any audience here for your audition. Also you seem to be the only person auditioning. Everyone else called us and told us they didn't want to audition for this. Basically we're just going to film you doing stand-up to an audience of no one and photograph you repeatedly with a flash camera. Then we're going to make you watch the footage of yourself and stare at the photographs of you that we took of you even though we're totally aware that this whole concept creeps you out! Ha ha ha!

That was when I woke up.