Val Kappa is a stand-up comic and artist who has appeared on Comedy Central and was the voice of Clarice on the cult cartoon "Home Movies". These are random things that she typed. All material Copyright 2004-2017 Val Kappa. All Rights Reserved.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Monday, July 09, 2012
even if you're not that good...
When I was 14 I played town team basketball in a league called SGBA(Saugus Girls Basketball Association). At some point during the season a shooting contest was held called "The Hot Shot Contest". I ended up coming in third place and as my prize I was given this t-shirt:
It should be noted that the only reason why I came in third place was because on the night of the contest there was a severe snowstorm. As a result, most parents refused to drive their kids to the contest. My father oddly did agree to drive me. When I got there, only 2 other girls had showed up. They came in 1st and 2nd place and I came in...3rd. So basically I won because of a VERY poor turn out.
My t-shirt has become my most worn piece of workout apparel over the years. It was huge on me when I was 14 and still remains huge on me now. No matter how many times I wash it and put it in the dryer, it NEVER shrinks despite allegedly being made of 100% cotton.
So it has become a life goal of mine to make this friggin' t-shirt shrink but I have a feeling it will end up distintegrating before shrinking...
Friday, July 06, 2012
The other day I signed up for a 5k running race. After signing up I noticed that there was a category option one could sign up for called "Athena". To qualify for this category one must weigh 140 lbs or more. I had never heard of such a thing until I saw it after signing up. After looking more into it, I learned that a category like this is set up because to weigh 140 or more is considered heavy and may make it harder for one to run.
I happen to weigh 145. Maybe I should feel insulted that I have qualify for the "heavy" category but oddly I got excited when I found out. Does my being excited about this mean there's something wrong with me?? :-D
Now I regret not actually signing up in that category. What happens if I lose weight and end up weighing less than 140? What happens if I never have the opportunity to run as a "heavy Athena" again?!
I'm filing this under "missed opportunities". I know when I run this race I'll be haunted by the fact that I signed up as a "general runner" rather then "Athena".
Oh the agony!